Introductions can be fun, especially online where no one knows who you are. I could write any spontaneous thing and you would believe it, but I think I’ll side with the truth about me. If your actually reading this I would like to personally thank you, I adore writing, but I am new at the blogging scene, so apologies in advance if I strike you as boring. Anyhow, my name is Samantha, I’m only 19 years old, I have a son who will be one January 27th and I’m engaged to the love of my life, Gerald .
I know that 19 is young to have a child, and get married and whatever else have you, but that’s how it is. Of course I never thought I would be here at 19, but the best things in life are unplanned and I can honestly say that being a mother changes your perspective on life, and there is no greater love than a mother’s. My son, Joshua, is my number one priority and I don’t care what any one else has to say, he will always mean more to me than anyone. It is very sad however to see all these teenagers getting pregnant, especially when they aren’t supporting themselves, how can you expect to support a child when you can’t support you. I went to school with a girl who was pregnant and she gave birth to twins at 15! That’s ludicrous, their father is not around, she’s to busy worrying about partying and who she can pick a fight with next, and her parents are at home playing mommy and daddy again. It’s like the goal of teenagers is to get pregnant at a young age. I know I fall into the category, but my situation was different, I moved out at 17 and was living with my boyfriend, and I still am, but we are a family now. I was supporting myself when I had my child, and yes I graduated, yes I’m going back to school, you can’t hold your children over your head as an excuse to why you can’t reach what you want in life.
I can rant about teen pregnancy in more detail in a later post. I would like to outline the past 2 going on 3 years with Gerald, the man who helped create my beautiful life. Gerald and I started dating when I was 17, but we initially met when I was 5 because I was, and still am, his little sister’s best friend. What was strange was when I met him again at 17, I didn’t remember him at all, but he surely remembered who I was, he just walked out of the room and said “Oh my god, Sammie is that you?” and that’s where it began. After that he wanted my number and we talked everyday, but at that time I was with my current, abusive, boyfriend who doesn’t deserve their name on here. I thought I was in love with him, but I was blinded and Gerald helped me see that, he was my salvation. When I left my ex he was so upset and he kept calling me every night and it was hard because he was friends with my cousin so he would call too. They couldn’t see that I was erasing him to be happy, he was mad we couldn’t be friends, but I didn’t want to be, he was not the kind of person who deserved to be in my life, and that was it, he was gone. Now Gerald and I moved in together fairly quickly, about two weeks after we got together, but we both knew what we wanted, we wanted each other. Here we are 2 years later engaged, but not getting married for a few years, we don’t rush things, we live day to day, because each day that we have together is a blessing. We both love our son very much, and Gerald’s thrilled to have a little boy he can raise and bring with him to fish and hunt, even though I go with him, it’s not the same.
When I’m married I will have a stepson that I’m sure neither of us will ever see. Gerald has a son in North Carolina whom he hasn’t seen since he was 3 weeks old, he pays child support, but she doesn’t want him to be with him, at least he can talk to him, but they both deserve more than a phone call. What makes me livid is the fact that she only calls when she wants money, makes me feel like she doesn’t spend it on him, which wouldn’t be surprising seeing as she has 4 other kids with her husband. On top of everything they want Gerald to sign his rights over, but he will never do that, why would he? He loves his other son just as much as the one he has here, and it devastates him that he can’t even see him. A mother’s love is very strong, but have you ever thought about how strong a father’s love can be, I have and I do all the time, because I see it daily. Gerald deserves more than what every one thinks, he deserves to be happy and I’m with him every step of the way.
So you’ve heard a little summary of the basic life that is me, even though I have tons more I could rant about, I will end things here for you. I would not want my first post to be too intricate that I may lose you. Follow me or don’t it’s your choice, I won’t always right about me, I will right about a multitude of topics, whatever is on the mind that day. If I strike your fancy and you’d like to hear more, follow me. You can also message me if you’d like, I’ll try not to be too harsh.
*If their are any writing mistakes I apologize in advance, I like posting cold writing because it is a reminder that nobody is perfect.*